Submarine Racing at The Point

 

I remember when I was sixteen...

Asked my dad if I could borrow his car...

He said “Yes, but fill it up with gas...”

So I grabbed some change from the old cookie jar...

I went over to friendly Joanne’s house...

Asked her if she wanted to go on a date...

I said we were going to go watch submarine racing... 

And that we wouldn’t stay out too late...

She asked where were we really going...

I responded “We’re going to The Point...”

At that, Joanne smiled and said “Let’s go!

It’s your submarine I’ve always wanted to anoint...”

She asked me if I was fully prepared...

Joanne had a devilish twinkle in her eye... 

Even though we had never gone this far...

I was going to give it the old high school try...

We arrived just as the sun was setting...

The sky was a beautiful orangish-red...

I stuck in my Marvin Gaye 8-track...

We had done this before, but only in my head...

She suddenly leaned over towards me...

And rubbed her fingers through my hair... 

Then she kissed me like she never had before... 

I was pretty sure we were heading there...

As Marvin whispered through the speakers...

“Come on, baby, let’s get it on...”

She grabbed my shirt and pulled me over... 

And said “Baby, I don’t have till dawn...”

And then, just at that very moment...

As my rocket was heading for the skies... 

I heard a loud crack against my window... 

A blinding light shining in my eyes...

A loud voice said “Come on, Romeo and Juliet... 

It’s past time to close down The Point!

If you two don’t get out of here, pronto...

I’ll throw you both right in the joint!”

I immediately jumped up and said “Yes, sir!”

And I put my dad’s car into drive...

As Joanne straighten her hair, she offered a smile... 

And said “Tomorrow night, I won’t deprive...”

As we pulled into Joanne’s driveway...

And I walked her up to the door...

She pulled me closer and kissed my lips... 

And said “Tomorrow night, we’ll go for more!”

As I pulled into my family’s driveway... 

My dad’s car suddenly stalled to a stop... 

That’s when I finally came to realize...

I was supposed to get gas, but I forgot...

I walked inside our house...

And gave dear old dad his keys...

He said “Thanks for filling her up, old boy! 

You can use my car whenever you please!”

It was at that moment I confessed...

That I forgot and the car ran out of gas...

He asked “Well, where have you been all night? 

Why, I ought to kick you in your rear!”

I said I was truly sorry...

And that I felt really, really bad...

I confessed I had taken Joanne to The Point... 

He just smiled and forgot all about being mad...

I said I would wake up early in the morning...

And take the gas can to the corner station...

I promise to do it before he left for work...

My offer seamed to squelch any remaining agitation...

I went up to my bed and dreamt all night... 

Of holding Joanne tightly in my arms...

It was a moment I had thought of often...

I slept warmly, holding my lucky charms...

I woke up early and got the gas...

And then went and filled up dad’s car... 

I was feeling pretty good about myself... 

Knowing I was about to go so far...

After dinner, before that sun went down...

I asked my dad if I could borrow his keys...

He said “Son, it’s time we had that talk...

You know the one, about the birds and the bees...”

I quickly assured dear old dad...

I already knew everything I had to know... 

Once again, I asked to borrow his keys... 

Saying, “It’s really time for me to go...”

He said “Son, I ran into Joanne’s dad...

And he shared some disturbing news...

He said he ran into Office Pete at church... 

When they were sitting together in the pews...”

He said “You were a bad influence...

And he doesn’t want to see Joanne again...

He asked me to relay his message to you... 

And as far as calling her, you should refrain...”

I said “But, dad, why am I the bad influence?

All we did was drive her out to The Point!”

Dad replied “Officer Pete shared a different story... 

Now, don’t get your heart in a big disjoint...

I ran into Joanne a few days later...

She was talking to the quarterback of our team... 

I said “Hey, Joanne!” but she ignored me...

She had already moved on, or so it would seem...

It was time for me to simply move on...

And to pick up the pieces of my heart...

I never got a chance to take Joanne to The Point... 

But I finally did get to upset her apple cart...

You see, the quarterback eventually sacked her...

He spiked her hard in the varsity end zone...

It was just a matter of time before she came back to me... 

Because Joanne couldn’t stand being alone...

So, just because it didn’t happen at The Point... Doesn’t mean it was never meant to be... 

Joanne liked to disobey her father...

And I guess that was just lucky for me...

© 2022 Jeffrey Pipes Guice

My Wonder Years: A Book