My Pet Roach

 


I have a wonderful pet cockroach... 

Who scares my sister half to death... 

He likes to take flight

in the dark of the night...

He grosses her out with his garbage breath...


My pet cockroach doesn’t like my sister... 

He scampers when she turns on the light... 

When my sister is sleeping

he likes to go quietly creeping...

He visits her room to give her a bite...


Sometimes, he hides in the kitchen cupboard... 

Just waiting for her to open the door...

Then he flies through the air

and lands squarely in her hair...

As she screams while rolling violently on the floor...


One night, when she was sleeping...

He decided to sneak into her room...

She felt him inside her ear

and pulled him out by his rear...

Then hit herself in the head with a broom...


My parents tell me to try to contain him... 

They get annoyed hearing my sister holler... 

She blames it all on me

as she tries to desperately plea...

To make my cockroach wear some kind of collar...


She has often tried to squish him... 

With a newspaper or maybe her shoe... 

But he scampers away

only to return the next day...

Bringing along a new friend or two...


One day, she’s bound to realize...

No matter how many locks she puts on her door... 

No matter how hard she tries

you can see it in his eyes...

He’ll just keep coming back for more and more...


© 2022 Jeffrey Pipes Guice

My Wonder Years: A Book

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